Almost got kicked out again.

Well today went to shit before it even began for me. It as mostly my fault anyways. I guess... I almost got kicked out again. Second time! And I'm only sixteen. If I were seriously to get kicked out, I'd have a place to go, and I'd have to be...

Crazy stuff.

Ahh. Another day where I get to sit and watch the sun and it's ways around this town until it's sun down. I hope Hayden comes over after work. I feel kind of shitty for not getting back to him soon enough when he messaged me this morning. I...

Gone Sour

Today was great until tonight. I took an anti depressant. I'm starting to take those now, my mom will give them to me once everyday. She's holding onto the bottle so I'm not using them to do something stupid. Also she's testing about how my mood...

Just about lesson learned.

Here I am, almost four fourty in the morning, sick to my stomach and thirsty as a motherfucker, Had a good/bad day yesterday. Got up early from Hayden's phone call about what our plans were from yesterday, and when he should come get me, Then...

Stuff. Thangs.

Can't wait until the fifth go around of being grounded is over with. Made a deal with my parents on keeping my grades up for school next year, and they're still iffy on whether to send me away, or not. So the deal is. If I fail, they're throwing...

Horrid.

So the night before last night, Mom calls me in saying that my uncle wants to speak with me, so I spoke with him and my mom said after vacation, they're leaving me behind in chicago to "straighten up" since I failed school, and I've emotionally...

Hell.

Welp, dad is home for the next three weeks to do work from home and this is a living hell. I won't get to see my boyfriend as much, and also there's a shitty plus to it. I'm grounded again. Yahoo! Over missing a few things with my chores. Um...

Almost got kicked out, and stuff about school.

Today was rather disturbing. Woke up being a grouch ass to my boyfriend. It was three in the morning, I was tired and in zombie mode pretty much waking up and nodding off and he started kissing me and stopped, then rolled over. So I rolled over...

There isn't always killing in curiousity.

So I'm some sort of womanizor in training to you. FUCKING GREEEAAAATTT. So let's bring it from the top... Last week my boyfriend went on my computer and went through my history and found "I want to have sex but I'm in a relationship." Then...

The air isn't so clear.

Well. I acted out so bad this morning I poured part of my feelings towards my mother. Not everything because I fear she'll argue, or talk down on me. I was partcially right about my fear of telling her about how I feel towards her and Freddy. She...

Can't you see? I wish...

Can't you see? Can't you see you're circling stress, anger, and depression on me? Can't you see your choices aren't the smartest anymore? Can't you see you've turned into something you hate? Can't you see you've lost respect for yourself?...

BS.

Well it's been awhile since I've been grounded so I forgot how ridiculous it could be. It's only ridiculous because I never know when I'll be free again. It's always been that way. There's been a few times when my mother has given me a start to end...

Life story.

So before I tell you about my issues, and the damage I caused, and why I'm walking this long hard road out of hell of depression, I'd like to tell you my life story. I was born and raised for seven years of my like in Elkhart, Indiana. I have too...

:/

Time to fake it. It'll be tough. I'm not anything special anyways. Let's hope I don't get caught with death's love marks. It's easy, and then it's hard. It's fairly easy to say I'm alright over a computer screen then it is in person. In...